A conversation to catch a fire

A dear loved one of mine had spent a late and cold evening telling me about what people were not doing for him and how he was not doing what he wanted to do in terms of work and his personal life.

He "hates" living where he lives and not having a car and complained that the family did not get together as much since his mother passed and so many other things. I listened intently.
I was listening because I love this person and also because I was telling myself that his echo of grace would soon come from all the words of his experience.
His pain deserved to be put down and at this time there was nothing more important than that.

It would soon come. He talked about work and job opportunities that he thought would come through for him and he blamed everyone outside of himself for the opportunities not working out for him; him not getting a job, respect, etc. It was all about him.

I respectfully tried to make it clear to him that we sometimes get whatever it is that we are putting out in terms of focused effort and that many bad experience are simply stepping stones to the higher plateau; especially when we have done all that we are to do to effect a positive response. It was confirmed as we talked that he had not sent thank you notes and in some instances was acting so desperately that he had sent no cover letters in applying for jobs.

In my professional world that behavior is unacceptable and I told him that there are standards of grace in life overall and noted that his industry practices and norms do not excuse him from those standards. Thank you; grace is a core requirement and competency if we are to engage the universe to deliver on our desires.

I listened to more of his pain for two and a half hours and then I shared the following:

It is a time for all of the men and the women of this time to hear the call of their hearts. We are also responsible to teach the children to do the same. We have settled for the empty feeling inside. We have settled for doing without. We have settled for less in a relationship, less in our work or career; we've settled for working daily as opposed to making an impact daily, we've settled for less health.
In turn we have settled for less love and say we are not fulling deserving by virtue of the lack of grace we display to call those desires into being.

We've squelched our desires and disconnected from what we most need as a result of not giving what we most need to give. We often think that fulfilling our needs comes in a form of another person and things. Validation of our worth by another person or a group, is what we seek but it is not the other person or group that we so truly desire, it is the God or call it best of the Universe within that person, group and the GOod energy of that experience that we really want.

Acknowledging this is the only thing that will quench the thirst of our souls and of hearts; most especially in an economy in crisis and the global turmoil of spiritual construct that we see in social and natural structures today.

We need not look to that other person. We must look within. The opportunity that is presented by loneliness, by hearing "no", by not being chosen, by having to go without for a while is one that forces, pushes and allows us to call forth a more divine energy and invest in our better selves. It is a call to stillness to provide the giving of grace that we wish so much to receive.

The reason many of us do not see your hearts desire and reflection of the same in others is because we do not see it in ourselves first and foremost.

We have not committed ourselves in action or spirit to our hearts desire.
Ask for what we are not willing to give to others first.

It is not until we stand fully and truthfully exposed in the mirror of our souls (hearts) that we will be able to stand fully exposed in the mirror of another soul and heart and get what we feel we need, desire and believe that we are entitled to have. We have to do the work.

We must study and learn what we do not know and be willing to accept if we do not measure up where we don't. We must situate ourselves in places where we excel best.
If we are deserving...we must keep trying in a place that welcomes us and our talent and what we desire most. Trying requires a different energy than complaining and crying victim.

We may still trip upon our personalities, our own humanness, and our own darkness so much that we can only see darkness in others. It is not until we decide to walk tall and fully through the maze of being human with the intent to let the darkness of experiences and other people be a call to shining our light that we win big.

How do we get there? Tell the truth about what you lack and commit to the work that is required to rise above it. When this is truthfully done you will finally be able to enter the heart of the God that stands in front of you. When this happens you will find the people and experiences that support you in your life, career, journey and overall wellness.


It is not until we decide to walk tall and fully through the maze of being human that it all changes. Beingness is the component of the source that we need to feel less alone and instead all one.



You will find your flame and life will be set afire!