Evaluation and Salutation of A MAN ( an advance thought as Father's Day 2011 approaches)

In evaluation and salutation of A MAN...

I love the men in my life. I am very blessed to have them.  Many of them are examples of men who are loyal to their friends, families, women and their children.
 

 They are all this and yet not perfect and they don't claim to be. As, I sit here a week from Father's Day and think ...what will I get for my Dad(?) I think about the structure of men. As for my Dad, this is a man who has never ever asked for anything of me other than to' go to school and be happy'. This is the man that was up at 5:30AM every morning to see to it that my sister and I got to 7 AM track practice when he was raising us in Texas. He's part of the reason I was a 9th Grader running Varsity and breaking records. (*discipline)
This is the same man that when we were just 'itty -bitty girls' picked my sister and I up from the airport after a trip to visit with our Grandparents in Jamaica and instead of taking us directly home to our nervously awaiting Mom, he took us to Manhattan and purchased life size dolls for each of us. They were as big as we were and they looked like us!! (*effort) I was overjoyed and can never forget that day. I was about 4 or 5 years old and the memory is fresh.


This is the man who cooks a delicious pepper steak with yellow yam and boiled green bananas.
He's the same man that kisses my forehead and pinches my nose (still). He is the same man that calls me "baby" and I know it's a " you are my baby girl" gesture. He is the man that told me that I am "very , very beautiful" and that I am ' twelve times as smart as I am beautiful and people should know that.' He's the man that brings my mother flowers on a regular basis no matter what is going on in life. He's the man that would buy my mother's signature fragrance and just put it on her dresser and not say a word. She would just discover it sitting there. I think I get some of my tender and romantic ways right from him. 
(*tenderness and * affection)

Of course I can call him and tell him I love him and even see if he and I can get together to go out for lunch.  
I could ask to and then steal him away like I did with my Mom for Mother's Day, but my "Daddy" has never been big on service outside his home or away from our home dining table. He's the MAN  that I learned I can stand in a room face to face with and tell a difficult truth and know that he will not walk out of the room.  
That's a standard.

I am  "lucky and different" is what I hear. I also hear that a lot of women of my persuasion don't have similar stories. I don't expect them to. Mine is mine and it's good.  I wish that the tenderness. protection, and confirmation of a well made man is something everyone comes to know. Truly.  I never think that he is perfect and none of us are.  He is ..just well made in other  notable ways.  Yes,  I think  I am a blessed woman because of the type of father and brothers and even uncles and male cousins that I have and also they type of love relationship that I  have had  with a MAN. They were and still are ever protective, playful, concerned with my well being.I know this. They can be called on to talk, hang out, escort me, answer a business question, replace a tire, move furniture and even  move me and my material life from one state to another. They are the men in my life and they were influenced by women who loved them and feel that they are grand and ultimate. I look at them and while I may be biased because the men in my immediate family are particularly tall,  handsome and silly  they make me laugh) ; I do feel that as I look at them I get glimpses of the original King's template.  


They understand that " father " is biological and "Dad or Daddy" is functional and they are both.

I  now have two amazing nephews (both son's of my two younger brothers) .. both  nephews have names that demand they perform greatly in this life. They are both growing up so fast. One will be a year old in August and the other will be three years old in October. They are at that yummy stage.   That is exactly it. As I look at the men in my life; the father, sons, brothers, friends and let's keep it real..particularly the Black men in my life.. because they do have a tougher time than their counterparts. I am very focused on what is "yummy" about them. What is tender, respectful, and clearly positive and defined about them as men that I and any right minded woman would want to cleave to?   Yummy is without anger, without fatigue, unrushed and it is welcoming to something brand new. 


I am curious often about how they were made.  I am not talking biology because that  part I get. 

I think that A MAN is made or unmade by himself. He will tell you that his mother, his father, grandparents, siblings, or his this one and that one created the emotion of him but in the armory of  negative thought; no matter how well he has been prepared and associated for success, he can also build the weapons by which he destroys himself and  his opportunities for the best in life and solid fatherhood if that is in fact  his calling or circumstance.

My oldest of three brothers named a company and called it "Self Made". It comes from taking responsibility as a man for your condition, your pride, your ego, your relationships and the lack thereof.

It comes from holding steadfast to the consciousness and knowing that you cannot achieve outside of you a truly great love (and any  real success) when hate and failure live inside of you and especially not when you project that energy towards others through action or judgement.

A Man  fashions the tools with which he builds for himself  into heavenly mansions of joy and strength and peace. He fashion the experiences that bring him, anger, distrust, loneliness, and despair.  He sets himself into places and environments where he can have psychological and spiritual growth or trauma. He sets his criteria and tone for acquisition or loss. He can also outlive the ones that are imposing the same on him. He may do it through discipline and achievement or failure and moments of despair. No less a MAN is he as he does this.  By the right choice,and through  honesty and comfort with his state of being and true application of clear thought and honest action, a MAN ascends to the Divine Perfection and is viewed as that and worthy of more. 


By the abuse and wrong application of thought and action to deceive others he descends below the level of the beasts of the earth. A Man can be where tenderness exist if he acknowledges it as being alive there,necessary  and gives it as much as he wants to have it given unto him.

When a play towards tenderness does not occur he is unmade and he and all that comes from him could end up living like the beasts of the earth. Foraging always for cover, shelter, searching to find a pack to belong to and even food.   His lies will define them and his sin will impact them. He and they that would come from him will forage and seek all their lives and be subject to great misfortune and lack. Ascension is an action that occurs on earth. So as A MAN treats or mistreats others they will be treated throughout their life. When he tires he settles for less than what he is worth and less than who understands and wants him.


As he does to men will be what is done to the boy of him. As he does to women will be done to the girl that comes of him. They inherit his intent and his scorn. What he denies will be denied them. They inherit not the joy he ever gets always but most heavily and always the sin  in all ways ...since joy is fleeting.

Darkness is heavier than light and any assault of the favored will befall the head of any innocence that comes of him. His forging and acts then should only be for good, truth, and well being of all that he comes into contact with. It is between these two extremes  that are all the grades of character, and man is their maker and master.' A man will show you who he is in the center of his misfortune and in times of adversity and stress.  When you meet him at something other than his "fighting weight" he will show you his frustration and deflect attention from the work that he needs to do in terms of self improvement. He will show you where he places his worth and in what that worth is invested. He will show you who he is and you are to believe him and forgive him...simultaneously. 

To be regarded as "yummy" ...He should have the way of the warrior and the carriage of the royal kings or he should not be allowed in your path.  He is unmade and not ready.  He needs your prayers and well wishes no matter where he is in your life. His fractures are to be accepted for what they are. It is how the light comes in. 


Mind, body, spirit are all in play and he is caring for all of those things to the best of his human ability. No excuses. When  a person knows that he is not there and  find him in the path it is best to speak your peace quietly and firmly and walk on by. He is not ready for you as much as he may say so ..he is not.  Walking away is a salutation to allow him to have the experiences that will carry him into being fully the MAN that he needs to be and the greatness that he thinks he may already have can get fair play. 

If you surrender to him your tenderness and he treats you with disdain, do realize that he has no clue as to the joining of energies; God to God's  and pray for him as you do yourself. You can do all of these things  through your faith in your highest state of being  and the most Divine God.

This is my understanding of the state of men ..through personal experience, the blessing of my cherished family men who serve as examples and variations of manhood while loving consistently, deeply, and with confidence that I love them back. This is my truth and as we go towards celebrating Fatherhood, I had to share it.

When you tell the truth..let is be like a Sunday sermon. Let it occur on a regular basis and be something that people can count on. If  A MAN  is not there to hear ..he misses it. The world is filled with causes to fight, opinions to render, love to have and give and joy to be had.  You are so busy ..get to it and remain AGAPE from afar if you must.

The disciplined, enthusiastic, faithful and noble reign supreme!Amongst them is the MAN and men who are made.